Sucking at video console gaming…

… is something I’m extremely good at. While I wasn’t born with this gift, I do believe it is something I’ve always been destined for. Video game consoles were a rare sight during my childhood in the 90s and early 00s: my family didn’t have one, my friends didn’t have one, and our neighbors didn’t have one. The few encounters I had had with one were when visiting family friends, and even then, I rarely did anything but observe. So naturally, I was excited when my family acquired a PlayStation 2 during my tween years, however, it didn’t take long to realize that the vast amount of time that I had already spent on playing computer games had made me accustomed to point-and-click controls. Shockwaves from my immense failure to grasp the console controls could be felt worldwide, and by even failing at games that require minimal motor skill to succeed, such as Tekken 5 and SSX 3, I found my true calling as that one person who really blows at video console gaming. I am the morale booster to the player who thinks they’re terrible but who don’t yet know that I’m even worse; I am the co-player that you wouldn’t wish upon your worst enemy to end up with for Pair Play in Tekken Tag Tournament 2; I am the girl who sucks at video console gaming.